If you have been reading our blog recently you know that tomorrow kicks off Movember officially! I am totally pumped for this year’s mustache!! I hope you will consider donating some money to the cause, every little but helps!
This Movember, I’ve committed my upper lip to help change the face of men’s health by growing a mustache, now I need your support at http://mobro.co/andrewcsloss.
I’m passionate about this cause for several reasons and they are as follows:
Because 1 in 4 adults in the United States will experience a mental health problem this year. Many men find the stigmas associated with mental health lead to feelings of shame and embarrassment, which often prevents them from seeking help and taking action. We must change this!
Because too many men are dying unnecessarily from prostate cancer. In 2014, more than 233,000 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer. The Movember Foundation is working tirelessly with an urgent goal in mind: accelerating breakthroughs in prostate cancer research that will benefit patients and their families.
Because too many men are dying unnecessarily from testicular cancer, the most common cancer in young men. Current treatments for testicular cancer are pretty good, but pretty good is just not good enough.
The Movember Foundation is working tirelessly to change all of the above scenarios for the better. Here are just a few of the examples:
The Movember Foundation is working to rid the world of the discrimination associated with mental health challenges and to ensure men and boys experiencing mental health problems know the signs and take action early.
Movember has helped to form one of the largest, global alliances of prostate cancer researchers and clinical specialists, who are tackling the toughest prostate cancer challenges.
The Movember Foundation is working around the clock and around the world to improve the lives of men and their families affected by testicular cancer.
I need your support to fund this important work. I believe we can create a world where men don’t have to face the stigma and discrimination of mental health issues; I believe we can create a world where no man will die of testicular cancer; and I believe we can create a world where no man will ever die of prostate cancer.
Yesterday the wife and I went to the gym after work. I often find the gym a great place to observe exemplary male behavior (*eye roll*). Last night was no different. I won’t bore you with the details other than to say I overheard two guys complaining about their wives and/or women.
Look, I know we all have bad experiences with the opposite sex (I could tell you plenty) but the truth is finding a wife is indeed a good thing. Whether you are a believer in God and/or the Bible ddoesn’tmatter. Getting married to a good woman will change your life in ways you cannot even begin to imagine. As men I think it is our attitude that needs the work, not our wives or girlfriends.
I will take just one moment to mention the importance of selecting the “right” woman. There are plenty of wrong fish in the sea (again I can speak from experience). We have to be careful to select a woman who is a “good faith woman.” In other words a woman who generally cares about us and people as a whole. A woman who isn’t in a relationship for selfish gain but generally desires to be in a relationship that is positive and growing. I have often found the problem isn’t the woman we choose to date or marry but rather our selection process (or lack of one.) Too many of us select a woman strictly on her measurements, lack of material in her clothing choices or other similarly stupid criteria. That ddoesn’tmean you can’t have all of those things in your spouse but if that is your top priority you cannot complain when her personality is a disaster of epic proportions – charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting.
Your wife is there for YOUR benefit not hers. Sure she might want to have children with you but now she doesn’t even need us for that! She has signed on with you because for better or worse she believes in the man that you are but more importantly the man you can become. She believes you have what it takes to be a leader of her family. Truth is we are all rough around the edges (some more than others) when we enter into a relationship. However, when you marry a good woman she is going to help smooth out those rough edges and make you a better man. At least if you allow her to.
Men, we need to understand that our wives only have our best interests in mind. If you find a good faith woman she will do you good and not harm all the days of your life. She will never stop looking out for you, your children or your family. She will help reign in your stupidity when necessary and encourage you to take risks when appropriate. She will support you and give you a source of strength you never thought imaginable. You will grow in respect among your peers and colleagues without even having to exert any effort to do so. Your wife will speak with wisdom and kindness and she will help to fill your home with joy, laughter and peace. And before you dismiss the previous sentence, have you ever come home from work to find a home not filled with those things? It is awful.
None of the above is to suggest you won’t have struggles or that you won’t have arguments. You cannot put two people with totally different characteristics into a house or apartment and not expect there to be sparks. Arguing is actually normal and healthy in a relationship. It is going to happen you just have to accept it and realize it is part of your life. As long as you don’t act like a knucklehead everything will work out.
If things are less than desirable in your marriage or relationship quit blaming her and ask yourself what is it that you are doing to add to the problem. You might not be 100% at fault but your contributions to the problems are the only thing you can actually change to make it better. I promise if you take responsibility for your actions your good faith woman will notice and if she needs to make similar corrections will do so. Your job is to love her. That is it. You do that (and don’t speak ill of her at the gym) you will have the best life imaginable.
Welcome to another edition of our Tuesday devotional!
A few years ago I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s Hyperthyroidism. You can read more about the condition here. In short, your bodies immune system attacks your thyroid gland disrupting your thyroid gland’s ability to produce adequate amounts of thyroid hormone. Now your thyroid hormone does many things but more importantly (at least for me) it helps to regulate your weight, mood and energy levels.
I have been to see my doctor as well as a specialist and have had very limited success in treating it properly. I even tried to control it naturally through diet, exercise etc with about the same amount of success. There is no cure for it. Instead, Dr’s recommend you take a thyroid supplement to help increase your hormone levels. Yet even though my hormone levels have increased it really hasn’t helped to increase my energy levels, control my weight or help me feel better. Honestly, it has been quite frustrating as you don’t feel like your normal self. I don’t want to bemoan my condition so I won’t go on at length about it. I just wanted to share with you that as of now I am believing that God will heal me (hopefully soon) and I can get back to normal because it has been several years now and I some days it is a real struggle to get through a day.
I finally decided to spend some extra time looking up some healing scriptures the other day and wanted to share them as part of the devotional today. I hope you will find this helpful today and more importantly I hope you take note of these scriptures and will study them for yourself. In order to help you I have typed out some of them but a few others I will only reference in hopes you will pick up your Bible and see for yourself.
Whether you are in need of physical, emotional or spiritual healing I am a firm believer that God can heal all of your infirmities. Stand on God’s promises and never cease to pray. If you have prayer requests please leave them in the comments, tweet them to us (@BetterMenNow) or email BetterMenNow@gmail.com
Let’s start with the one I am using as my faith scripture:
“Worship the Lord your God, and his blessing will be on your food and water. I will take away sickness from among you,and none will miscarry or be barren in your land. I will give you a full life span.” Exodus 23:25-26
Here are a few more to get you started…
“He said, ‘If you listen carefully to the Lord your God and do what is right in his eyes, if you pay attention to his commands and keep all his decrees, I will not bring on you any of the diseases I brought on the Egyptians, for I am the Lord, who heals you.'” Exodus 15:26
“Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits— who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.” Psalms 103:2-5
“Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress. He sent out his word and healed them; he rescued them from the grave.” Psalms 107:19-20
“Aware of this, Jesus withdrew from that place. A large crowd followed him, and he healed all who were ill.” Matthew 12:15
“Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord.And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” James 5:14-16
And these you can look up on your own. Happy healing!
Well after spending almost an entirely useless three days in St. Louis I am excited to be heading back home to New York City later today. I miss my wife, my city and this week has just been very frustrating.
As usual today we turn our attention to men’s fashion because I know so many of you need the help. One trip to the airport is all I need to know that men have some serious issues when it comes to being even the slightest bit fashionable. So here are some ten hideous violations regarding fashion (you can count eleven if you are a hipster) and the proper corrective measures to take.
1. Socks with Sandals
Please just stop this one immediately. WHY do men persist in this disaster of a fashion choice? I mean it doesn’t even look remotely good. Do men stand in front of mirror and say, “Oh yea, I am gonna get laid today wearing my socks and sandals?” That has never happened, not even once. There isn’t even a practical purpose behind wearing this. If you are worried about having cold feet than you shouldn’t be wearing sandals in the first place. Lord help you if you are going like this to the beach. Nice tan line bro.
If you know someone who is doing this please call for help. Operators are standing by.
2. Don’t Rush the Shave
Every man at one point or another has run out of the house and missed a spot or two when shaving. If you are like me and you notice later on in the day it will drive you nuts until you can get home and shave it. I won’t lie. On more than one occasion I ran to a drug store, bought a disposal razor (not recommended) and took care of business.
When going through your routine you should allow yourself enough time not to be rushed. Shaving is meant to be enjoyed not despised. For those difficult to see areas I recommend you get a shaving mirror. Of course if you ever want to really treat yourself I recommend you go to the professionals for a straight razor shave.
3. Avoid the Heavy Handed Branding
As we discussed a few weeks ago, there is nothing wrong with buying for the brand name, but you should be doing so because you like the fit, the look etc, not because you are looking for status. Besides these two guys have no chance in the world of meeting a beautiful woman, let alone getting luck with one. If you are still holding on to any Ed Hardy clothing, please send it to me so I can properly dispose of it. It burns easily in bonfires.
No one wants to see a walking advertisement when they go out. We are inundated enough via the web, TV and our phones/tablets. Go cool, not commercial.
4. Wearing Running Shoes Outside the Gym (or When Not Running)
This one can be a bit tricky because even I will sometimes throw on my kicks if I need to run to the bodega. Yet I only do this if I plan on being outside less than 15 minutes or if I am in some kind of footwear crisis. Yet I shudder every time I do so.
Generally speaking, active wear should not be day wear (don’t even get me started on people who wear workout clothes to Wal-mart or anywhere else that doesn’t actually involve working out.) Even if they have no obvious scuff marks, the fact that you wear your runners at the gym during heavy sweat sessions makes it nasty to even consider donning them on any other occasion.
So what is the alternative? Sneakers of course. Grab a pair of Chuck Taylor’s, Jack Purcell’s, Ked’s or some kind of non-active wear sneaker. And please don’t do high-tops.
5. Being a Professional and Wearing a Backpack
What? Are you still in high school? Or perhaps you are simply trying to recapture the great times you had in college. If you are a professional you should never, ever be wearing one to or from work.
Once you leave college (hopefully with a degree and within 5 years) you need to ditch the backpack along with the beer bong and grow up. You want to look sharp when you are at work. To look sharp you need to add polished accessories to compliment your sick wardrobe of dress shirts, suits and blazers. Invest in a nice messenger bag or briefcase. Take up camping and hiking if you want to relive your glory days through your backpack.
6. Suits and Shoes Should Match
This one can be a bit more tricky for men because it requires us to pay more attention to the color of our shoes (not everything is “brown” or “black.”)
Most of the time black goes with everything. However, it doesn’t go with a flat brown color. To pull off brown (or camel) colored shoes the brown needs to be on the darker side of the spectrum. Follow this advice, however, and you’ll avoid this common fashion faux pas: pair black suits with black shoes; gray suits with black or camel shoes; brown suits with brown or camel shoes; and navy suits with black, camel, tan or oxblood-colored footwear.
7. Oversized Clothes
You don’t have to be overweight or skinny for this to be a problem. As humans we all have different body types. Even if you are the perfect weight, shape, height etc., you might still not be able to find properly fitting clothes. For example, I have more of a European body type i.e large calves and sloping shoulders. Thus, many of the dress shirts I try on look huge in the shoulders and across my back because they are designed with a more American body type (square shoulders.)
However, through diligent searching I have found a number of places I can find clothes, especially professional clothing that is a better fit for my body type. In addition, I cannot say enough about the importance of tailoring your clothes if they don’t fit properly. You don’t want to go around looking like a fashion runway reject do you? So pay attention to the shits you buy. Some will be ultra slim, slim, regular or some other cut. Don’t get mad if you try on an ultra slim shirt and it is too tight. It’s slim for a reason. Find a different type of shirt and you will be right as rain.
8. Stuffed Pockets
My dad is the worst when it comes to this one. He has a wallet that is Costanza-like. If you aren’t familiar with the reference check out this clip.
Your pants are a great place to put your hands, a little spare change, a nice money clip and some extra “protection.” They are not meant to carry your cell phone, keys, wads of cash, your receipts from three years ago and business cards. Having lumpy pockets takes away from the streamlined look you should be going for when dressing. It doesn’t matter if you are wearing jeans or dress slacks. You have to avoid bulging pockets.
If you find it necessary to carry a large amount of items on your person than you need to invest in a nice bag (not a backpack, we already discussed this above.) Messenger backs are great as are briefcases. If you are an active gent than you can buy an all purpose bag which is just as fashionable (this does not mean a gym bag.)
Of course a smart guy knows that if he is wearing a blazer or suit jacket he likely has four additional pockets he can use to stash his goodies. Doing so will help you keep that sleek, streamlined look.
9. Not Buttoning Up Properly
We discussed this one along time ago and hopefully you have been following that sage wisdom ever since. However, for the few scofflaws still out there walking around like a hobo, the advice is pretty simple.
If you are wearing a three button suit the rule from top button down is, sometimes, always and never. If you are wearing a double breasted suit it should always be buttoned. For a two button suit you want to only use the top button. Whatever you do when you wear a suit please never sit down without unbuttoning your jacket.
Any other way you do it will cause your suit to pull, stretch and otherwise look unfashionable.
10. White Socks With Dress Shoes or Black Socks With Tennis Shoes
I don’t see this often (thankfully!) but it does happen more than it should. I mean c’mon! Once is way too many! No one should look into a mirror and think this is a good look. If you are having a sock crisis and have no dress socks, white socks are not the solution. The only proper fashionable solution is no socks (i.e. sock-less, much like your love life is sex-less if you are wearing white socks with dress shoes.) I can’t even waste any more time on this one.
Yet there is another fashion no-no that I see WAAAAAY too frequently. In no proper world should you be wearing black socks with tennis shoes or sneakers. The one exception would be if they are “no-see” socks. But this:
Not acceptable. It conjurs up images of my grandfather mowing the lawn in black socks and loafers. Yikes! Don’t do it people. Nothing says “I ain’t getting any” like this look. Step it up guys!
What other fashion disasters do you see men too frequently trying to get by with? List them in the comments!
“But godliness with contentment is great gain. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.” 1 Timothy 6:6, 9-10 (NIV)
When I was an assistant coach with the Pittsburgh Steelers, I received an offer to take a job with another club. I was making around $25,000 at the time, and they were going to offer me a salary in the neighborhood of $30,000. It doesn’t seem like such a big amount to some people, I’m sure, but that $5,000 was a 20% increase over what I was making in Pittsburgh and a big difference to me at the time.
I asked Coach Noll if I could talk to him about it. I really wanted to stay in Pittsburgh, but I didn’t want to pass up a chance to make more money. I was secretly hoping he would encourage me to stay by matching the offer. He did encourage me to stay, but told me he would support my decision either way.
The one piece of advice he gave me was to not make my decision based solely on money. Coach Noll urged me to consider who I would be working with, what I could learn from them, what type of environment it would be, and how much responsibility I would be given. He felt those were the important things to weigh, and if I became a good enough coach, eventually my salary would reflect that.
Through my years as a coach, and especially as a head coach, I tried to impress that on players. At times guys became eligible for free agency, and I would have to have an “it’s not just about the money” talk with them. Certainly they had to weigh the differences of financial offers that they received, but as several of them learned, taking more money and moving to a different team sometimes resulted either in an unhappy, disrupted family or with their careers heading in a different direction than they enjoyed with our team. In a couple of instances, guys ended up out of the league more quickly than they would have if they had stayed with us. For them, the short-term financial gain wasn’t worth the long-term results.
Does money have an unhealthy hold on you? Remember, it’s not money itself that is the problem. It’s the love of money that will spin everything out of control..
Uncommon Key – The decision you make in your life are based on your priorities. Write down your top five priorities. Where does money rank on that list? If it is high in your priorities, make a concerted effort to lower its importance in your life.